This is so hard to write.
However, dispite having been happily married for some thirty years to a man I still love, and have had two beautiful children with, I recently strayed.
Attending an employee only function with my work, I had unprotected sex with a Nigerian colleague of mine, who is also married.
I confess to having fantasized about interracial sex for some time before it happened, So when the opportunity came I succumbed.
Since that first time, it has happened a couple of times more.
I have no excuses, other than like many similarly long marriages, despite the love still being there, in our case as strongly as ever, the sexual side tends to be come somewhat stale and routine despite trying to keep it fresh.
Therefore, after a few drinks had loosened inhibitions, and my colleague began to come on to me, I played along, and responded to him.
finishing up, I'm ashamed to say, in a rather messy and tacky coupling in the back of his car in the carpark.
Since then it has become more orderly usually in a small hotel some distance from where we live.
despite it being the 21st Century interracial couples still turn heads in the small town we both live in.
I have resumed using precautions as my partner prefers not to.
Although the first two or three times were unprotected.
Him climaxing inside me as now but without any attempt at precaution.
I feel so confused.
Dirty, a cheat, betraying my kind and gentle loving husband in one moment.
Yet enjoying the excitement and risk of discovery that seems to add an intensity to the affair, in the next.
Writing about it here seems to help ease the inner guilt I have been keeping inside muself.
