I Want to Kiss Him So Bad, Is That Cheating?

I’m in a long-distance relationship that of which I love, I adore him. He’s so perfect for me and he’s the first time I’ve felt anything close to how the feeling of love is described, even if I think he loves me far more than I love him, unfortunately.

But, of course, are long-distance relationships even real? Who to say, but I have this ex whom I see every day. We’re best friends even after our break up. I never loved her, but i loved what she gave me. Someone to see on the weekends, someone to try shit with, kiss, hold, be held by.

And to be honest, I just want to get back with her behind his back, so I can keep up all the sweet stuff with him but *feel* all the sweet stuff with her. The cuddling, the long car drives, the video games and the movies. The kissing. I want to kiss her and pretend it’s him; even just once would fix this. It would get me just close enough to feel him. I love him, i wouldn’t think any of this about her if he was here.
I want to kiss him so bad I’m willing to kiss her again and “cheat” on him. Is that cheating? Is it really?

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