I am depressed. I just didn't feel any positive feelings anywhere I go, or anything I do.
While just staying in my place I can't help but recall the sad thing I did.
It wasn't a serious accident or anything, it was just like kids jostling for candy.
But it made me sad. Really sad.
That I think about committing ******** myself more than doing my task now.
I wanted to let it out in a confessing chatroom but it won't let me type for some reason.
I wanted to explain how I couldn't respond to them that day but I think they don't even want to see my face now.
Maybe everyone there thinks I'm a fcking moron too.
I have my friend sitting right next to me but I can't even say anything to them because they probably don't understand anyway.
I'm trying to get into games, books, exercising,… but nothing works.
The only thing I have never tried was medicine and drugs, which already have right now because I don't want to be relying on them.
I don't even want to know if I am having any kind of mental illness right now.
The only thing I can do while walking past that place is tormenting my thought. What should I do…
