I’m in love with my fwb

I met a guy about 2 1/2 years ago and it was supposed to be a fwb situation. We are both married. The day I met him I knew I would fall hard and I have. In the beginning things got confusing for me because of things he would say, “like you are the woman I should have married”, “f… it lets just run away”, etc. While I tried not to take things to heart they eventually hit me. Things are very spaced out and he keeps me at arms length. No contact unless we are to see each other, etc. I, am hopelessly in love. I cry when I leave him. I am suicidal. I love him enough not to cause him problems with his marriage since that is what he wants. But it’s killing me. I”ve ended it so many times only to go back. Taking whatever he would give me. He is my one and only affair/fling and I’ve been married a long time to an asexual man. I don’t want to hurt him either but this is truly killing me. I gets lots of attention from a lot of men but I’m just not interested. My hopelessly in love. And to make matters worse he is pushing away because of how I feel even though I make no demands, ask nothing of him, and basically am at his disposal. Which is not very often. I need help before I destroy myself. I can’t seem to instill in him the desire to love me back. So I’m left with hurting all the time wondering what can I do to fix this. It will be three years soon and I can’t believe that after three years he has no feelings for me but that is what he tells me. And he’s moving a 1,000 miles away for business. My friends tell me to move on and find someone else but I just can’t.
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What do you think?


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  1. Dawn, of course i know what a fwb is. And I wouldn’t be in this situation if I had something to focus on. But when you are married to man who thinks intimacy is for people who are trying to conceive and you do nothing together but argue what the heck is their to focus on? Nothing. If I could have saved my marriage I would have before this. And I’ve been married for 22 yrs and 3 yrs ago had enough. He even knows how I feel.

  2. let me get this right
    So you have been having an affair with a man for three years and you get nothing from him but sex, you said so yourself that he is pushing you away and keeping you at arms lenght. So what is the differnece between your husband being sexually unavalible and this guy being emotional unavalible. Seems to me they are the same, and that you are a low self esteemed person who like toxic relationships. They are both unhealty and you can’t let either go, you are the factor in both of these. Please get some help for yourself, and leave both of them, you are way to old for this kind of lost hopelesness behavior.

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