He smelled like love

He called me around 10:30pm to see if he could crash at my place. My ex was staying over so I told him I would go pick him up at the bar and give him a ride home. When I got there he was telling some friends bye. We went inside for one more beer. We talked for an hour or so about his ex and my ex and made plans to get together soon. When it was time to leave he would not let me drive him so I followed him. On the back road out of town he pulled over and told me he was ok and I could go home. I hugged him and told him I would see him soon. He sent me a text as I was leaving asking if I could be faithful to him. I told him yes and had every intention of breaking it off with the man I was currently seeing to get back with him. I sent him one last message telling him to “be careful, call me tomorrow”. He never called. I heard about a wreck and knew instantly it was him. I wanted to die too. They found his phone. He was trying to text me back when he went off the road. No one knows I was the last person to see him alive and hug him and smell his beautiful smell. I think about him every day and wonder if I had just kept following him and we got together, would we still be together today? Or if I would have told my ex to leave so he could stay. Some days I blame my ex for ruining my life.