During my early years in college I had a summer job working nights at a hotel. It paid better than minimum wage and included both dinner and breakfast for free. I met a man there, he would sit with me for breakfast. He worked in the kitchen. More than once he invited me to go to his apartment after breakfast to listen to music. Finally one day I went with him. He quickly took off his clothes and left only his underwear on. He invited me to the same, he said it got hot in his apartment. He invited me to lay on the bed with him and hold his erection in my hand. I was very nervous and stood off. He got up and took his underwear off so he was totally naked. He told me he had wanted me for a long time and now was the time for us to make love. He kissed me and unbuttoned my shirt and ran his hands over my chest. He grabbed at my crotch and turned me around and pressed himself against me, humping me. He managed to get my pants down, and I was naked with him. He was kissing me on his bed, rubbing his erection against me, holding my erection in his hand. He pushed my head down and rubbed his erection against my face until I opened my mouth. After doing the same with me, mutually having oral sex, he pulled me up, and got between my legs pushing my legs up high and penetrated me completely. I won’t lie, I liked it completely. The more he kissed me the more I liked it. I slept with him naked on his bed and after we woke up he had penetration with me again. I fell in love with him and it hurt for me to go back to school.
The following summer he didn’t work at the hotel and I spent a very lonely summer. When I got back to school I was taking a management course and I met a guy who was a little older. We talked and he invited me to his apartment. He had a large picture of himself in the entry, in his bedroom and bathroom he had pictures of himself totally naked, some of himself with an erection. On his nightstand he had a rubber erection, he said it was a mold of himself he had done in the Philippines. He gave it to me to hold. I was very embarrassed holding the rubber erection, he grabbed me by the crotch and started kissing me. The minute he kissed me I liked it and I let him kiss me all he wanted to. When he lowered my pants I went along, when he laid on me naked I opened my legs for him. He gave me oral sex and asked me to give him oral sex. He penetrated me while he kissed me. Later that night he penetrated me while laying on my back. In the morning he showered with me and we kissed and shared oral sex with each other.
After college I got married to the girl who had been waiting for me at home. It was typical wedding of the day. Our parents knew each other and were in favor of us getting married. In short order she became pregnant and we had a family. It is now 25 years later. I have deep desires to have sex with a man, I want to be kissed and I want to hold an erection in my hand. I want to be penetrated. But I’m scared.
