Need a Change

Dear lord, help me with myself please,i keep going wrong, I’ve been on the internet again for hours, for all kinds of secular things as distraction, although i don’t start out that way. then i get to sleep too late, feel bad the next day for wasting my time. still smoking, spoiling my health. plus there are so many warning signs, how do i warn my dear ones if they’re not even Christians?? most of the church is deluded with false signs and wonders, and delusions, and being complacent. I know so much thru study an research, but how do i tell others? the few i told just don’t take it serious, going on with their lives as usual. also, back in my mind is the fear of getting the responsibility for tk again, I’m not up to that anymore. i feel responsible for him, and for warning others, saving them in time, but can’t even get my own life in order anymore. please let me be able to hand over to you these responsibilities. it’s too heavy a burden, they bring me down, while it’s needed to go up. please give me peace, and help me get from a 5 back to a 7 or better still an 8. i need you, lord. can’t do it on my own. it’s all fear, you know. distrust in you. lead me, tell me what to do. i don’t wanna have regrets. let me put my trust in you, wow that is hard. would help if i heard from you. please take over even if I’m afraid of surrendering to you. even if I’m not rebellious on purpose, please forgive me and help me line up with you. the way is not a teaching but a person: you. that’s what i heard someone say. be me or be with me. amen.