when i married i was young and full of shit. i had the idea that all was fifty fifty, men and women were alike. if i did the laundry, he folded. i never cleaned the bathroom, he did it. when the kids came, it was division of labor, and i pushed as much as i could on him.
one day my parents were over and i was in a bad mood, and i yelled at him. he grabbed me by the wrist and drug me outside, i mean he is a lot bigger than me. took me behind the garage and told me i was a bitch and bitches slept outside. he turned on his outside shower he uses when he works in the yard, the water is ice cold, stuck me under the shower and started washing me with his man soap that keeps outside.
i struggled but it didn't do any good, he was intent on doing what was on his mind. he ended up stripping my clothes off and washing me from head to toe, my hair included. i was red all over.
when he finally settled down he told me i was bitch, and as a bitch i was going to sleep outside naked. inside, he would let a woman in. and his woman was going to shut up, and take care of him and his house. and she was going to go to be with him. not get in bed and turn her back to him. he wanted pussy and he hadn't had any for a long time.
he left me out there, then turned around and threw me his shirt and told me to decide if i was going to sleep out in the cold, or warm his bed.
i decided to be a woman, his wife. i warm his bed at night and look after him and his house. everytime i feel this ugly part of me coming up i go outside and take a cold shower to remind me of my place and that my place is beside my husband. i have never refused him access to his woman since then.
our lives are much better, and our kids are much better and sex is much better. i hate to admit it, but i sorely needed being put in my place.
You seriously need counseling. Why would you let a man humiliate you like that? Do you feel worthless? I am married 30 years and I will be damned if my husband EVER treated me like that, he would be out of my life for ever.